DATE: 11 Aug 2010, 11:45 pm / MOOD: Full of Life

Yes, that's right. A road trip... A three day road trip, starting bright and early tomorrow. I can't wait.  It's already started out horribly. XD

 So we're going to meet my brother's fiance in Ogallala, Nebraska.  She drove from Canada to Chicago tonight.  It was supposed to be like... a twelve hour drive, instead she just arrived about an hour ago.  In return, we all have stayed up WAY TOO LATE.  We're leaving in six hours.  Better start the caffeine overdose now no?

 Anyway, we will be taking the interstate all the way there, and then on the way home we'll be going into South Dakota to see the mountain of president heads, and then we're going to drive back through Yellowstone and home that way.  It should be pretty coming back.  However, they've decided to let me drive. Hehe.

I have no idea where we're going.  I'll just get a copy of the google maps and wing it.  I have until Sunday night to be back.  Here's to hoping we're not going to have to rescue a canadian between Ogallala and Chicago. XD

 ANYWAYS! Wish me luck, reader.  I'll need it. Oh, and good morning.

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DATE: 31 Mar 2010, 10:47 pm / MOOD: Crappy

Dear Stranger, (I said I wasn't gonna' write these anymore.  I lied.  Read if you want.  I'm just posting it cause it makes me feel better for some reason.)

 

You asked me what was wrong today.  I told you it was nothing, but there was so much more I wanted to say.  I wanted to break down in tears and tell you that you were my problem.  I wanted to tell you that the recurring dreams I’ve had in the past couple of weeks are driving me insane.  I wanted to scream “don’t marry her”.  I wanted to collapse in front of you and let you see me in pain, agony, and I wanted to tear my heart out of my chest and throw it at you.

 

Once upon a time, I learned so many valuable lessons from you.  Once upon a time, all I wanted to do was know you, to love you, to hang on your every word.   Then she came along.  Then I watched as you pulled away from everything we started to discuss, and bottled everything up.

 

I knew your life fell apart, and all I wanted to do was hug you, and tell you everything would be ok, but there she was, ready give you that extra push.  It shouldn’t be her.  It should be me.  I want to tell you so bad that you were my knight in shining armor, and that now that I look at you, I see aluminum foil. I realize you only wanted to be that knight, until the wolves came along and you could feed me to them.  I realized that she was the glowing light in the lake that King Arthur so foolishly followed.  Look where that landed him.

 

Sure, I should give up this foolish belief that I will ever have you, and for a time, I tried, but then the dreams got worse.  I was the friend on the side that watched you propose to the other girl, and I was the girl that in the end, had her chest ripped open, and their emotions scattered everywhere but where they should be.  I was the friend that you didn’t want anymore, because of some stupid girl.  Really, I just want rest.  I want to lay in bed at night, and for once, just lay there, numb.  I don’t want the pain anymore.  I don’t want the tears.  I don’t want the nightmares.  I don’t want to wake up with a soaked pillow.  I want to wake up and feel refreshed.  I want to go to work, and not lose my train of thought thinking about what USED to be.  I want things to go back to normal.  No, I don’t want normal. I want you.  I want everything there is to you, and I want you to know that you’re my everything.  You’re my good, my bad.  You’re my ice cream when I’m depressed. You’re my exciting, and my boring.  You’re the name I look for when I log in.  You’re the person I want to see every second of the day.  Someday, maybe… maybe….no.  I GIVE UP.

 

*sigh* that felt good.

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DATE: 01 Jul 2009, 8:29 pm / MOOD: ^_^

New icons on the profile, for the collectors. :D

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DATE: 12 Mar 2009, 12:14 am / MOOD: Tired

Call it randomosity for lack of sleep.... Damned anime's anyway.  So I played a WII today.  They're.... interesting.  I want one, so that I can take it apart and find out how it works.... and then so that I can put it back together... wrong! :)   Don't ask me why, but it was the only major urge I had when I grabbed the remote and started waving it around.  *shrugs*

 Also, I finished Hell Girl Season 1 today.  *drools*  favorite episode is about a girl  who was orphaned at a young age.  An older woman, who sponsers the orphanage takes her in, and raises her to have some sort of arranged marriage with her son... and really, the mother wants her to be a doll in every sense possible, and the girl damns the old woman for it, naturally.  Ironically the moral of the story ends up showing a "like mother like son" arrangement... *shrugs*

 You wanna' know something else?  I recorded me... playing.... River Flows In YOU. <3  I can't wait until my piano is tuned.  So glad to be back. :) HI GUYS!

 -faery_gurl

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DATE: 13 Dec 2008, 11:19 pm / MOOD: Crappy

The mood with this blog... Wow... Anyways, on with the title, as they're always explained!  I am.... a computer whore, as those of you who know me know.  I blog, I have myspace, 2 gothopia accounts, a yearbook, a facebook, a livejournal, a umm... gaia...3 of those actually, and I don't even know how many other community things I have. (wait for it I am coming to the point where I explain the title).  So anyway, once every four months I try to change every single account to a new style, just to be creative, and change some of the info to see who's watching.. Well, I just recently started the "My yearbook one" and it has a box there that says "anything you want"... thouroughly thinking this through, I finally came up with an answer.

 Ready for this? It's like a whishlist for Christmas....  I want a man who's so gorgeous he sweeps me off my feet before a word even exits his mouth, who's every word makes me speechless. I want him to be better than me in every way and I want to be his only one, as much of a defective side kick I may be.  Yeah.  That was the best, most effective thing I could come up with.... Crazy huh?

Ok, so not really, but who the hell is going to find a person like that and actually have the whole world know it!?!?  Then I remembered... I've been reading Twilight for the past.... week now?  Yeah. I read three out of the four... well, I'm working on the third, I haven't finished yet.  So I decided I read too much.

There's really no point to this blog, I'm just trying to tire myself out so i can sleep and wake up for work in four hours.  So... "ANYTHING I WANT!"  Do you think there was ever anyone that would say that, and actually be able to keep that promise?  You know, like... If I wanted to jump off of a cliff, and live when I hit the sharp... jagged rocks at the bottom... It's not technically possible, but you think anyone's ever tried to keep a promise like that?  Eh.  I also want nachos.  A life time supply of mountain dew.  An even bigger supply of reeses, and I want to be so absolutely smart that I can look at myself and say.... "shut up stupid"... cause well... I don't know.  I'm sure there's a reason.  Anyway, off to bed with my pointless musings... I gave up on going no where.

GOODNIGHT! - karen

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DATE: 30 Aug 2008, 4:48 pm / MOOD: Full of Life

 

 

“Check,” John said as he moved a chess piece forward on the board.  “You’re move,” he added, looking up at Ferrin.

 

“I’ll show you check,” Ferrin grumbled quietly, making the one and only move he knew that he could.  He knew he had lost, but refused to surrender.   John would have to take him clear to the end.

 

“Check mate,” John said, making his final, usual move.

 

“Goddamit!” Ferrin growled.  This was the fifth time today that John had taken him with the same ending move.  “Must you rub my face in your brains!”  He slammed his hand down on the table, then got up and moved to the TV.

 

“Of course I must Ferrin.  You’re only here for another week.   How else would I make myself feel smug?”  John watched as Ferrin flipped past the news, where a picture of his wife displayed on the screen.  “Hey wait!  Go back!”

 

“To what?”  Ferrin was already ten channels past the one John was looking for.

 

“The news.”

 

Ferrin sighed and flipped the channel back to the news.  There it was, a picture of John’s wife.  Her face smiled back at them as if staring through his soul.   Her smile always did intimidate him.  He turned up the TV as the reporter continued the broadcast.

 

“- Miss Amia Fox died in a tragic shooting over in England early yesterday morning by one of the king’s men.  She will be sorely missed, and we will hope that there is a reason for this assassination, as the last one is the reason for the war we’re in now.”

 

Ferrin muted the TV and turned around soon enough to see John fall to his knees.  “I’m sorry.”  What else would he say?  There was no warning.  They sent her away so that she wouldn’t be caught in the middle of the war, and next thing they knew, she was dead.

 

“No.”  John was staring at the ground, watching his hands shake, trying to breath.  So many thoughts ran through his head.  What would he do now?  How would he fight a war AND raise his kids?  “It can’t be.”  He punched the ground as tears began to build in his eyes.  “She was my everything.”  He choked back the knot in his throat as he felt Ferrin’s hand touch his back.

 

“It’ll be alright John.  Things will work out.”  Ferrin tried to comfort his life long friend, but the words he wanted to say weren’t coming out the way he wanted.  He shut his mouth and rubbed John’s back, hoping that was enough help.

 

“Maybe,” was all that John could choke out as he stood up and walked to the couch.  The reporter was still on the TV, with john’s wife displayed next to his head.  John turned it up to hear the end of the report.

 

“-the president, though he says he will be doing his best to take care of these terrorist problems, has sent out a request for all American’s to be returned home immediately.  Many have been placed on the next flight home, and a few, as reports have told, have already disappeared.  It seems Miss Fox will be the second of many victims to stand in the king’s way, who, as we all know, will not be backing down.”

 

The TV went to commercial and John stared at it in awe.  “That’s it?  He’s bringing the American’s home?  What about my wife?  What about the man that went over there and was killed for no reason?  What the hell is he thinking?”  He stood up and put his shoes on.  “I’m going out,” he said, not even looking at Ferrin,  “watch the kids.”

 

Ferrin nodded and sat down on the couch.  He bowed his head down in thought and hoped John wouldn’t do anything stupid.  He looked up at the hallway the kids were sleeping in and shook his head.  Sure, he felt loss, but not as much as John.  How much would those kids suffer when they learned about it in the morning?  He saw a small shadow creeping down the hallway and next thing he knew, Daine appeared in the doorway.

 

“I had a bad dream,” she said,  “Where’s daddy?”

 

Ferrin stared at her for a moment and patted his leg.  “Daddy’s out walking around hon.  What’s the matter?”

 

Daine walked over and sat on his leg.  “I had a bad dream,” she said again, and looked down.

 

“And what was that dream about?”  Ferrin asked, trying not to let the tears in his eyes show.

 

“Mommy,” Daine answered.

 

“What about your mommy?”

 

“I had a dream that she… well,” Daine stopped talking and played with Ferrin’s fingers a bit, then looked back up at him.  “I had a dream she died.”  She looked up at Ferrin and tears started welling in her eyes.  “I don’t want mommy to die!”

 

Ferrin closed his eyes to hold back the tears, and one dripped out from under his eyelids.  “It’s ok sweetheart.  It was just a dream.  You’re mom’s on a plane to Australia, remember?”

 

“But what if she did die?”  Daine cried.  She didn’t care if the dream was real or not.  It seemed real enough for her.  “I want daddy!”

 

“Daddy won’t be back for a little while, dear.  Should we get you a glass of milk and talk about things until he gets back?”  Ferrin ran his hand up and down Daine’s back, trying to keep her calm.   Having four children of his own, three of them being girls, he had a pretty good idea of how to keep her content until her dad got back.

 

Daine sniffled and nodded.  “Mmhmm.”  She got up and waited for Ferrin, then followed behind him as he walked to the fridge.

 

“So do you want it warm or cold?”  Ferrin asked.

 

Daine responded with a shrug and sat down at the table.  She closed her hands together and waited patiently for the milk, cold or warm, and sniffled a couple times every now and then.

 

Ferrin sighed and put a cold glass of milk down in front of her.  Then he grabbed himself a glass of water, and sat across from Daine at the table.  “So what do you want to talk about kiddo?” he asked.  Even with his four children, he still didn’t know what to talk about with a twelve year old.

 

“I don’t know.”  She sipped her milk and stared at Ferrin. 

 

For a minute everything was quiet.   He watched Daine’s eyes well up with tears three or four times and then dry again, as if light were merely flickering off of them.  They glowed a dark red color, and Ferrin finally touched her hand to let her know she wasn’t alone.  Obviously she didn’t want to talk, but she did want company.

 

Daine looked up at him, and for the first time since she’d woke, she smiled.  “Is daddy coming home tonight?” she asked.

 

“Yes, but it may be late when he does.  Do you want to go back to bed and talk to him tomorrow?”  Ferrin replied, not wanting to break the recent news to her.

 

Daine nodded and waited for Ferrin’s approval to go back to bed.  She let go of his hand.  Someone always tucked her in, and since dad wasn’t there to do it, Ferrin would have to do.  “Will you come tuck me in?” she finally asked.

 

Ferrin smiled and stood up.  “Sure.  In fact, I’ll carry you back to your bed.  Does that sound like a plan?”

 

Daine nodded and waited for him to pick her up.  “What’s that sound?” she asked.  A high pitched ringing had started going off outside, and it irritated her ears.

 

Ferrin stopped and listened then went to the window and opened it up.  He turned in time to see Daine cover her ears and start screaming for the loud siren to stop.  I never expected this here, he thought to himself.

“What is it?” Daine cried, “Make it stop!”  She covered her ears and climbed into Ferrin’s lap.

 

Ferrin picked her up and carried her down the hallway.  He’d heard this siren a few times back home, but he’d never expected one here.  I hope Jack’s ok, he thought to himself.  He walked into the back left room of the house and woke up the boy that slept there.  “Come on Gabriel.  We need to go outside for a while.”  He grabbed Gabriel’s arm and walked him outside, still carrying Daine in his arms.

 

“Where’s my dad?”  Gabriel asked, still trying to find out what was happening.  His ears ached with the noise of the siren as they exited the house.  He pulled away from Ferrin and covered his ears.  “Where’s my dad?” he asked again, this time shouting.

 

Ferrin pointed to the bomb shelter in front of them, signaling for the two kids to go into it.  “He went for a walk.  He’ll be ok.”  Ferrin followed the two kids into the shelter and shut the door behind him.  He could hear jets and bombers overhead as he did.  God Jack, please be ok, he thought again.  Next thing he knew, he heard a knocking on the door.  “Oh god, what now?”

 

“Open up!  It’s me!”  John cried from the other side.  The door opened and there stood Ferrin, Daine in his arms and Gabriel already halfway back to sleep on the bunk.  He walked in and waited for Ferrin to close the door.  “That kid sleeps through anything,” he said as he took Daine from Ferrin.

 

“Yeah, I know.  You weren’t gone long.”  Ferrin replied.  His head was spinning with emotions.

 

“I had almost made it to the hotel your family was staying in when the siren went off.  I ran back here as soon as I heard them.”  John was panting from being out of air and he put his little girl down.  “I’m just glad you guys are alright.”

 

“You made it to my hotel?”  Ferrin asked.  His voice begged to hear news of his son.  “Did you see Jack?  Was he with the girls?  Is he ok?”

 

“He’s fine.  I saw him come running out of the building with the rest of the people that were staying there.”

 

“Oh thank God.”  Ferrin let out a sigh of relief as he sat down on one of the four beds that were set in the corner.  “That’s one less thing I need to worry about right now.”

 

“Yeah, I know.”  John joined Ferrin at the bed and Daine followed behind him.  Gabriel was sleeping again on the bed across from them.  They were silent aside from Daine’s cries that pleaded for the bombing to stop.  Every time the shelter rumbled, she squeezed John’s leg tighter.  He picked her up again and saw the small fingernail prints she had left in his pant leg.

 

“Your eyes are swollen, honey.  What’s wrong?”  John asked, as he held Daine and lightly stroked her back.

 

“She had a dream,” Ferrin said, answering for her.  “She dreamed her mother…” he swallowed as he held back a knot in his throat.  “a dream that her mother died.”  Ferrin felt his heart sink as he sat there, watching John’s eyes well up, nearly as big as Daine’s who began to cry.

 

John closed his eyes, and felt a few tears seep out from under his eyelids.  His entire world fell silent.  He could no longer hear the bombs outside, or Daine’s wailing.  Ferrin was merely a blur as he blinked a few times, and closed his eyes again.  The news had finally sunk in.  His wife was gone, and the next victim would put him in a position of power that even he couldn’t control on his own.  He looked over to see his son tossing and turning on the bed.  A nightmare John knew was the same as Daine’s.  He, however, would know what it meant, when Daine did not.

 

“It’ll be ok Daine.  Why don’t you try to get some more rest, and we’ll let you know when we can go back to the house.  Does that sound like a plan?”

 

“So mommy didn’t die?”  Daine sniffled.

 

John sighed.  He couldn’t tell her that his wife hadn’t died, because she did, but he couldn’t tell her that she had.  He couldn’t talk about it without freezing up and losing focus on something much bigger.  “We’ll talk about it when you wake up, love.”  He picked Daine up and laid her down on one of the other three beds and waited for her to doze off to sleep, all the while holding her hand, and keeping her calm.  He didn’t know how long passed as he stood there, watching Gabriel toss and turn, and listening to Daine’s sniffles.

 

Ferrin stood up and walked over to John.  It had been an hour and half of silence, and though he understood, things had to be done, or they could have been in there for das.  “She’s asleep John.  The bombs have stopped.  Turn on the radio, and the tv, and wait for the signal.”  He pried John’s hand away from Daine and watched as he snapped back into the real world.

 

“Alright.”  John walked over to the tv and hit the power switch.  Then he waited.  Nothing happened.  He checked the plug in the wall, wiggled it, and tried again.  Once again he got no result.  He walked over to the radio and flipped the switch on that.  This also responded with silence.  During drill they had been trained to listen for a high pitched sound, like the siren they’d heard earlier.  “You don’t think the city lost electricity do you?”  he asked Ferrin.

 

“If it did the generator would be working now.  Something must have gone wrong.  What I don’t understand is that the lights to the shelter are still on.”  Ferrin looked up at the lights soon enough to watch them turn off.  “Or not…”

 

“Well, I guess we venture ouside.”  John grabbed  a suit that hung against the wall, and a gas mask that hung over it.  Slowly he slid into it, and walked over to the shelter door.  “If I’m not back in ten minutes…”

 

“I know,”  Ferrin replied with a nod, “lock it back up and stay put.”

 

“Precisely.”  John pulled the handle on the door and eased it open.  The light of the morning sun beamed in on them as they stood there.  John looked back once more and walked out into the yard.  The door slammed shut behind him, and he heard the bolt snap as Ferrin locked it.

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DATE: 13 Jul 2008, 12:28 am / MOOD: Queer

She came in late. The rain seeping off of her coat and running over her eyes. The place was small; homely, as empty as it was. She walked to a table in the corner, dark and unnoticeable, then pulled out an old wrinkled paper covered in scribbles, from her pocket.. She looked up. A younger girl disappeared in a doorway as she did.
"Odd," she whispered, "I didn't see her come in." She continued reading, looking up occasionally to look around. no one had shown up except the girl only moments ago.

An hour passed, then two, and even a third, when she finally put the document away. The place was good for her to use for shelter and warmth. Her cat, chilled to the bone, paced back and forth outside the window. She watched it until it stopped and meowed. "I know, love," she said, as if to speak with it.

She looked around again. The girl that had disappeared through the door way had returned and was standing behind the bar, staring at her. "Can I help you?" she asked, feeling uncomfortable. The girl took a glance at her then turned to walk out the doorway behind the counter. "Wait!" she said, trying to stop her. The girl stopped and turned
back around. "Is this your home? Am I intruding?" The girl remained silent. "I'll assume I am. My apologies. I thought this was a tavern." She turned to leave and looked at the cat still eyeing her through the window. It let out a small squeak again. "It isn't mine. “I can't." She argued with it. The cat meowed again and the woman
looked away from it, back to the girl who had disappeared. A man
stood in her place.

"I do believe you've scared my servant. We don't get visitors this time of night, unless they're in trouble." The man walked out from behind the bar and opened the door leading outside. "Here, kitty," he said and patted his leg. The cat traipsed in, tail in the air, as if
she had been offended in some way. He picked it up and walked over to the woman. “Welcome to Glencoe Tavern; seven years running and still open."

The woman curtsied and shook the man’s hand. "I assure you, sir, that I am not in trouble and am not running from any form of the law. I need a room to stay in, and perhaps a drink. I will pay however much you ask, and I won't be any trouble. I only need somewhere to stay for the rest of the night." The woman was shaking from head to toe and still drenched. She pulled out a coin bag that exploded onto the floor as she held it out. "I have money." The man grabbed her arm as she stooped down to pick it up.

"Leave it. I don't much care for pointless coins. Most people pay off their visit through conversation, and company. Sit down. Have a drink. Tell me your troubles. We'll see what we can do about a room, and don't mind Karen, she's a little bit off." The man walked behind the bar and placed a glass on the counter. "What'll ye' have?"

"Something light," the woman answered, "I need a drink, not a lake. No reason to get plastered at this time of night. Though I have to ask, what do you mean by paying off my stay with company and visiting?" The toll seemed unusual for her, particularly because the window had a sign that insisted pay was required.

The man smiled and pulled up a stool behind the counter, pouring her a small pint of beer. "I mean I'd rather talk to someone on this stormy night then stay down here in silence. Karen will be leaving for a short while. If you stay long enough for her to do that, the room and food are free, simply because I don't favour storms, especially lightning. I'm not proposing anything bad. I'm only proposing that you have a conversation, and maybe tell me about yourself, you know, to keep me busy."

The woman looked up to see the young girl enter back through the doorway. She was wearing a cloak that drowned her and a small ribbon was tied around her neck. The woman presumed this was her mark of servitude. "Hello, again," she said to the girl and looked at the man, "I accept your offer, but I insist you don't keep me too late, as I have to be up early. There are some things that I must do in town, and then I must find some new lodgings."

"You can stay here as long as you want." The man poured himself a glass and laughed. Then he looked at the young girl. "Karen, do you think you can perform your business at a reasonable pace tonight?" The girl nodded, taking a glance at the woman again. "Good. Be gone then, and try to return within a few hours, at the longest. Alright?"
The girl nodded again and walked out the door. The cat ran in as she did.

"No." The woman stood to stop it and picked it up. "My apologies. He's a bit nervous when there's rain." She looked in the cats eyes and held it up to the height of her head. "You can't be in here Love.It could be disrespectful." The cat meowed and she put it down. Immediately it returned to the door, waiting to be let out.

"Here kitty, kitty," the man said quietly as he crouched down behind the counter. The cat turned and went to he man. He picked it up and slowly ran his hand down its back then pulled out a bowl. "I love cats," he explained, "They have a sort of intelligence that you don't find in any other creature." He took a slice of bread from the counter and tore it to pieces, then placed it in the bowl. "Finish that and I'll get you some warm milk," he said to the cat. He looked up at the woman. "Does it have a name?"

"Love." She seemed tense. "And mine is Misery." She sat back down, all the while watching the cat. She then took a glance at the bartender. Do you intimidate me on purpose, or is it simply a subconscious thing?"

The man seemed confused. "I don't understand. How am I intimidating?" I don't have your name. I have a bag of money that you don't want. You're friendly beyond the terms of acquaintance, and you have a servant that doesn't speak. Neither of you have sound in your walk, and your bar is unusually empty, even for this time of night." She
adjusted positions, feeling uncomfortable.

"Oh. My apologies." The man reached out his hand to shake hers. "My name is Kepsi. I don't want your money, because this bar is meant for something much better. I've always been one to judge personality by looking, not by meeting, so everyone is a friend immediately. My servant was mute before I took her in and neither of us have sound in
our walk, because we have practiced, not because of anything odd, but because we believe it disturbs silence. My bar is empty because we've been doing some spring cleaning, and many customers, like this town, are sleeping, or home for the season."

"Why this season? Spring is the busiest time of the year." Misery pulled a pen out of her purse and a piece of paper. "Don't worry. This isn't an interview. I simply have some things to write before I forget them." Kepsi nodded. "If you don't mind my asking, where does your servant go so late at night?"

"I thought this wasn't an interview." He laughed quietly and poured Misery's drink back up to the rim. "She goes home. Yes, her hours are late, but I do allow her to live at home on her free time. Servants aren't slaves, and they certainly have their rights."
”Llies.” Misery thought quietly as he answered.

She scribbled a little note onto the paper and looked up at him. "Excuse me for a moment. I need to write some things down. They're kind of personal." Kepsi nodded. "Thank you," Misery said as she walked over to a table by the fireplace. It was much easier to see what she was writing when she could still see the ink. The note she had written was barely legible. She turned the paper over and began writing again:

~~~~~~~~October 16, ~~~~~~~
It seems my second week of my travels have found me in a small, clean cut village. It's very peaceful here, and all the people I've met so far have either been servants or the middle class. There is a young girl at the palace resembling the one I was sent for. I have told the owner of a tavern down the road that I am merely passing through, but he has offered his hospitality, and I do believe I will accept his offer until i've further information. The silence at this time of night proves there are secrets throughout the town. I merely wonder if perhaps there is something more. The tavern I've been in for the past few hours (it's 8:30 now) has been very quiet, though the bartender claims that people have merely gone home. He, himself, is awfully peculiar. His eyes are a yellow color, and he has a soundless step, even though he seems to be a rather average size. It's amazing how much they resemble cats, both him and the servant. Love took a liking to him -"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Misery looked up. The man had moved from behind the counter and was slowly walking towards her. He immediately stopped and looked at her. "About done? You're beginning to make me paranoid." The man chuckled quietly. "Your cat wants out. Is he allowed to go back out, or would you rather he stay in here for the night?" Love was pacing by the door, yowling as loudly as he could. Misery had not noticed as
she had been writing and pulled out of her trance.

"He can go out. That's fine by me. It's stopped raining now." Misery watched as the man walked over and opened the door. She closed her notebook and placed it in the inner pocket of her cloak. "And yes... I'm finished for now. I didn't mean to be rude, but it was a memory that I had to write down."

"Understandable." Kepsi had sat back down on his stool behind the counter. Misery had not even noticed he'd moved."I often find myself trying to remember something and not being able to, so I can empathize." He laughed quietly and shook his head. "Karen should be back in a few moments. Would you like for me to show you to your
room?"

"Wouldn't you rather wait until she returns so that you can watch your tavern?"

"Nope. No one will come in. I can guarantee that at the moment. I am sure by the time I get back down here, Karen will have returned. Call it tradition, seeming as she does the same things every night. An hour has passed already. It normally only takes her about an hour and a half on nights we have guests. Come along, and I'll show you to your room." Kepsi grabbed a candle and turned to the doorway behind the door, coming out with a key only seconds later. He waved her back through a door to the left that led up a flight of stairs. "I'll be putting you on the first floor, if that's alright. The second floor
is reserved starting tomorrow, and I am assuming you'll be coming back through eventually." Misery nodded. "Then I'll be sure to leave the room for you, unless you decide you don't like it."

"Thank you." Misery followed quietly behind him. The only sound she could hear was her own footsteps. The hallway was blindingly dark. Kepsi stopped at the first door at the top of the stairs. "Are we there?'" Misery asked.

"We are. That walk wasn't too terrible was it?" Misery shook her head. "Good." He pushed the door open slowly, creaking as it went. It's small, but you'll find it supplies all the essentials. There's a bedroom, and a bath, if you wish to get cleaned up from the storm, and the beds are comfortable; Karen has made sure of that." Kepsi looked at her once more and smiled. "I have a lot to do for the group coming in tomorrow, so please make yourself at home, and I'll be down the stairs if you need anything. If I am not at the counter, ring the bell." Misery nodded. "Thank you," he finally said, bowing, then closed the door behind him, leaving misery on her own. She sat down at a small table next to the bed, pulling up a chair, and pulled out the paper she'd started writing on before:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"-imediately. I wonder if they've anything to do with the wonderful job I've been given. Babysitting is not my specialty, particularly when I pay with my own money. Tomorrow I shall see what it takes to get inside the palace walls, and perhaps make an appointment with the prince. For tonight, a rest, and perhaps some mediation before the task lying ahead."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Misery grabbed a small booklet with a thick pile of papers from her cloak and added this one to the collection. Placing it back in the inside pocket, she sat down and crossed her legs.

 

The night was quiet for hours, and she remained seated, legs crossed, in meditation. The past months had unfolded very quickly, and she was still unsure of what she was supposed to be doing. Legend had always led her to wonder what would happen near the end of this war. “What’s your story?” Her memory repeated. Last week continued flashing through her head, over and over again. “Everyone has one. Mine just circles around the elements of war. I’m asking… What’s your’s?” His knowledge had been the most educational experience she’d had in years.

 

“Damn it!” she screamed, punching the ground she sat on, “What did he mean?” She stopped and breathed, focusing on the air entering and exiting her. The sound of her heart beating entered back into her mind. She breathed again, and her pulse slowed. She looked around her. The room really was comfortable, just as Kepsi had promised. The bath she had drawn was still steaming, and the bed was warm. She looked at the door, still closed, and stood up. “I should get Love,” she thought. As she reached for the handle, a small thud came from downstairs. She pulled her hand back and stared at the door. Awaiting someone to come up the stairs, she remained quiet and slowly moved toward the wall. Another thud came. It sounded as though whoever it was had no purpose is going any farther than the bar downstairs.

 

She grabbed a knife from her bag and slid it into her pocket. The sound seemed to become more frequent as she moved. She listened closely, and then quietly snuck out the door. She crept along the wall, watching both in front and behind her. Danger in a tavern… Amazing where it finds itself nowadays. She pressed against the wall, listening to the rumble from downstairs. Suddenly the sound of footsteps grew louder. They were getting closer and closer. She crept toward the nearest room. Please be unlocked, she hoped. She grabbed the handle and twisted it slowly. The door clicked open and she eased her way in, then blew out the nearest candle, so the room would appear vacant. Luckily there’s no one in here. She listened behind the door as the footsteps passed by her. A black shadow passed, entering the room at the end of the hall. She caught a glimpse of man with brown hair, down to the ears, and a girl was sagging over his arms.

 

She looked back toward the stairs. It was quiet downstairs. She proceeded down and took a look around. There was no one there, not even Kepsi. “Hello?” she whispered. The tip of her knife dug into her hand as she looked around. She walked behind the counter and crept into the room behind it. “Kepsi?” He did not answer. She twisted around, listening to footsteps running back down the stairs.

 

Not wanting to be seen, she hid behind a pile of crates. There sat Kepsi, waving back and forth, and he smelled of alcohol. The bartender drinks as well? She looked back to where she was standing. A shadow of the man before stood there. “Kepsi?” she heard him say. She wanted to reply for the drunk slob next to her, but thought twice of the idea. “Kepsi, get back out where I can see you, and bring some towels immediately.” She looked at Kepsi, realizing the emergency. Off in a corner was a pile of towels. On the other side of he bar, she heard the man say something else as she slowly carried the towels to Kepsi, then as though the world around her had forced it, she shoved Kepsi out to speak with the man. He returned seconds later, towels still in hand, but the man was already back up the stairs. What in the world? Her mind raced with ideas, and she quietly felt her way back up the dark stair case.

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DATE: 04 Jun 2008, 7:41 pm / MOOD: Cranky

Esmerelda stood, stunned, with her mouth drooped open.  It closed, then opened again, as if she wanted to say something.  Alistar put his hand to the bottom of her chin and closed it, then pointed to the stairs, holding a set of keys out in his other hand.  “Go on.”  She did, without another word, taking Alistar’s glass of wine as she left.

He waited until she had disappeared around the corner before he stooped down and picked up the girl.  Her head leaned in against her chest as he did.  Her body was limp.  He could hear her shallow breathing, and she looked up at him as he carried her to the back room.  Her eyes still shined with tears.  “Kepsi.”  There was no reply.  “Kepsi, get back out where I can see you, and bring some towels immediately.”  Alistar’s voice was still calm, and he breathed as though taking a stroll in the park.  He still heard no reply, and no signs of movement.  “Damn that man.  He leaves anytime drama arises.”  He turned to take the girl to his room.  There would be towels there.  The lanterns were dimming, nearly out of oil, and he did his best not to trip over anything.

He reached the top of the stairs, following the hall by strictly memory and sound of his own echoing footsteps.  Every door he passed now had a lantern lit behind it.  The room he’d passed earlier was open, and was now the only dark room in the entire hallway.  Odd.  He stopped at his room at the end and scraped the door until he found the lock on the handle.  It creaked open, and he inched his way toward his bed, where he lay the girl down.  Instead of taking the time to light the lantern on the small table, he grabbed the two from the restroom, which were barely lit, but would work until he bandaged the girl.

He stopped and stared down at her.  Her eyes were closed, and her chest was the only thing moving as she lay, all physical and mental effort placed into breathing.  The lash marks oozed with blood, and her face was the only place undamaged.  He slowly ripped the towels he’d grabbed from his restroom and sloppily stitched them together to make a bandage.

He removed the rags of the girl’s shirt first.  She squirmed as he did, and he held her down to keep the task simple.  He succeeded in removing her shirt and looked her body over.  Her chest and back looked like raw hamburger, mashed together and sown together with potato skins, though her skin was much softer than a potato.  Her face was pale, as if all the blood in her head had left it to help the wounded parts of her body.  Her lips were a light pink, soft, and the color of a peach skin.  Her eyelids had a layer of blue eye shadow that now looked like a bruise smeared all around her eyes.  Her lashes were black as midnight, and her long, black hair lay flat and straight like the ocean at sunrise, shadowed by mountains.

He began to wrap the towels around her chest.  She began to wake up, and squirmed, panicking.  He pressed her wrists down and held her legs with his.  I can’t help her if I’m too busy holding her down.  The thought of the rope his mother had flashed through his head, and he remembered a bottle of chloroform he had left in his bag that he’d used earlier on his trip to knock his mother out.  It had kept the traveling peaceful.  “Stay with the living,” he whispered, “I’ll be back in a moment.”  He walked out the door and found himself near his mother’s room only moments later.  It was silent behind the door.  He knocked quietly and waited.

“Just a moment,” Esmerelda’s voice called, muffled from inside.  She appeared at the door a moment later, dressed in a long, blue, silk gown.  “Alistar,” she said, remorse in her voice.

“Mother, I need that rope.”  Alistar ignored the glare she held on her face.  “She’s reached a state of panic, and refuses to let me help her.  I need the rope.”  He watched her adjust positions as she stood in the doorway.

“Fine.”  She walked away to get the rope.  Alistar remained planted where she’d left him.  She reappeared from the restroom with the rope, still bloody, only seconds later.  She threw it at him and slammed the door shut immediately.  “Good luck!” she sang from behind the door, and Alistar hurried back to his room.

The lanterns glowed on the small table as he entered back in.  He looked around as he entered back into his room.  His bag lay open, the bottle of chloroform laying at the top of it.  The stationary he’d used earlier lay scattered on the floor, and the bed sheets were torn up from the bed that was made when he’d arrived, covered in the girl’s blood.  She, however, was no longer laying there.  Wonderful, he thought, she can’t have gone far.  He eased his way over to his bag and pulled out the chloroform and a napkin he had tucked into the side pocket.  Pouring a small amount into the napkin, he placed the bottle back in the bag, and turned around. 

The lanterns cast a silhouette of him around the room.  A cricket was chirping outside.  She can’t have gone out the window.  His thoughts raced as he looked for the girl.  She wouldn’t live long in her condition, and Alistar began to panic.  Frantically he started searching around the bed, underneath it, and by the table.  He opened his door and looked down the hall in both directions, then slammed it shut again.  Where did she go?  He turned back around and a quiet gasp was heard from nearby.  She was in the room.

Alistar looked around again, and his eyes led him to the restroom.  Of course.  He slowly walked over toward the entry of it and looked for a shadow.  The lanterns that had been placed in there were no longer in there, so the room was dark.  He could hear her shallow breathing from behind him as he pressed his back against the wall outside the bathroom.  “Come out, come out, wherever you are,” he said quietly and calmly.  The girl’s breathing slowed as he edged closer.

He listened a moment longer, deciding where she was behind him, and jumped into the small restroom, knocking the girl to the ground.  She kicked at him with little strength and pushed him away, failing miserably as he held her down.  He closed the napkin covered in chloroform over her mouth and watched as he eyes closed.  Amazing,  he thought, she’s beautiful, strong, and a fighter.  He stood and carried her back to the bed, then proceeded to tie her down for when she woke up.  He looked around, searching for towels.  There were only two, resting on a bar connected to the wall, in the bathroom.  He pulled them off and ripped them into strips then wrapped them around her stomach.  She was skinny, and her rips poked through her bloody, torn up skin.

Alistar felt her rigid body shake as she breathed.  She’s in shock.  He rubbed her stomach lightly and slowly wrapped more towel pieces around her, moving them slowly up to her chest, lifting her every time he wrapped around her back.  Temptation finally pushed him and he lightly ran his fingers over her breasts.  The blood around them gushed onto his fingers and he continued to wrap.

The chloroform was already wearing off, and he could feel her legs moving under him.  He ran out of towels as reached the top of her chest.  At least the important parts of covered.  His mind raced as he looked over the rest of her body.  Her pants, more ragged than her shirt, still clinged to her bloody legs.  He felt her neck for a pulse.  Her head jerked away, and he held it still.

She was conscious again, whimpering quietly as he felt for the pulse.  Five minutes past as he pressed his finger hard against her neck.  He still felt no heart beat.  I should bandage her legs.  He left the room to find some more towels and ran down the stairs.  Kepsi had returned.  “Kepsi, as much as I want to punch you right now, where are the towels?”  He watched Kepsi wipe down glasses that had been resting on the counter.  He was drunk, but still able to comprehend what Ali wanted.

“I’ll get them.  Have you seen Karen?  I haven’t seen her tonight.”  Kepsi walked back out of the back room, carrying a large pile of towels.

“Who?” Alistar retorted.

“My servant.  She seems to have come up missing.”

“No, I haven’t seen her,” Ali lied, yanking the towels out of Kepsi’s hands and running back up the stairs.  He had left his room door open and ran back in, then quickly went back to the girl, Karen’s, side.  “Keep fighting,” he told her, gasping to catch his breath.  Her body twitched again.  He climbed on top of her and rested partially on her stomach. He began to pull her pants down and he heard her whimper in pain.  A knife would work better, he argued with himself.  He got up and went to his bag and pulled out a pocket knife then went back to Karen, and by the twitches in the ropes binding her, Alistar could tell she was panicking.

He climbed back off of her and squeezed her stomach, trying to keep her quiet.   He couldn’t take the downfall for his mother’s mistake, and a girl bound unconsciously to a bed would not look good on his record.  He squeezed harder as she whimpered again, and covered her mouth with one hand.  Shush, he thought, as though she was telepathic.  She bit the edge of his hand and he pulled it away with a small smack to her cheek, now bandaging her legs.  She stopped struggling and lay there, without movement.  Ali got up and dug through his bag once more, looking for some thread and a needle.  He found a large needle he’d used for sewing leather and a small bit of thread on a spool and began sewing the bandages around Karen.  She continued to lay there.  Maybe she understands now, his thoughts mislead.

He lay down next to her when he finished sewing and listened to her breath.  She breathed quietly, but it was even.  He lay there, listening for two or three hours, arm wrapped around her stomach to let her know she wasn’t alone.  He debated on untying her, in case she panicked again.

Alistar watched her face as she lay there.  There was no emotion to it, though her eyes still shined with tears.  She had been crying as he bandaged her up; he had assumed it was because of the pain.  She stared straight up, never at him, and the sun reflected off of her pale face as it began to rise.  He watched her for a few more minutes, and his eyelids began to feel heavy.  People were moving around outside in the hallway.  Welcome to Italy, he thought to himself, closing his eyes and falling asleep, not expecting Karen to struggle any longer.

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DATE: 04 Jun 2008, 7:40 pm / MOOD: Cranky

Macdougall’s Tavern lay on the outskirts of Venice. Alistar found himself there on every visit and had just sat down at his usual table near the fire place. He was watching the waitress go from table to table, scurrying through the people. Perhaps a room should be taken care of first. He thought, staring at the bartender, who was much less busy than the young lady. He stood up and walked over slowly. People followed him with their eyes as he did. Amazing. He thought again, as he glanced at each of them.

The man at the counter looked at him as he reached the bar. “I’ll be with you in a moment,” he shouted over the crowd. Alistar nodded to show he’d heard and sat down on an empty stool. Only moments later had the man walked over. “Alistar,” he commented, remembering him from the past visits, “glad to see you’re in good health.”

“Indeed,” Alistar replied. “I’ve even been so healthy as to bring mother along this time. I need a room. Actually, I’ll need two of them. Are they available?”

“Aren’t they always?” The man laughed as he poured Alistar a drink. “How long will you be staying then?”

“Perhaps a week, but no longer.” Alistar pulled out a bag of coins from his jacket. “That should cover it.” The man said no more, took the bag, and placed two sets of keys in its place. “Thank you,” Alistar said with a bow and turned to go up to his room. He left the second set of keys on the counter. “Mother will be in for these. You’ll know her when you see her.” The man took the second set and put it below the counter and continued business.

His room was placed at the end of the first floor, the same as always, and Alistar walked in to see the place unchanged. There was still a small table with dying flowers in the far left corner. A bed still lay in the center. The small window to his right was still stuck open, and the restroom next to it was dimly lit by a few lamps. Consistency, He thought, this is the only place that still uses it. At that, he pulled a stool out from under the small table and lit the lantern on top of it. He immediately began putting the free stationary that lie there to use:

~October 17~

We arrived in Venice, Italy, early this morning. Mother whined the entire way, and I feel I shall have to leave her here during the mission. I don’t particularly want any attention drawn to it. Kepsi was so kind to oblige me with a second room for her. It’s amazing what he can do with absolutely no notice. His servant seemed to be… jumpy… this evening. Then again, there were hundreds of people here.

Upon receiving father’s news last week, I believe this trip will be short. His arrival at home cannot be missed, and mother is in a hurry to get the arrangements started. Also, James seemed in a hurry to be somewhere… else, now that the American girl, Daine, has arrived at the palace. I would assume he’s hiding a girlfriend of some sort and doesn’t want her becoming jealous simply because he’s around someone else.

In any case, this trip shall be short, strictly business, and so will my ranting tonight. I think I will take Kepsi up on that drink he was offering, and I will find out exactly where mother got off to.

Alistar took the paper he’d been writing on and tore it in half, then, after throwing it away, went back out the door. Things had quieted down in the bar, and the halls were starting to grow dark. Was I really in there that long? He looked down the hall he was in. All was black, except for a light at the very end that seemed to illuminate a door. “I must have caught the end of the party.” He walked down the long hallway, passing the lighted room, and slowly crept down the stairs. The lights, further in the bar, were still lit.

“Welcome back.” Kepsi was standing behind the counter, watching the last few customers in the corner. “I figured you’d give in for a drink eventually.” Kepsi pulled a chair from a back room and set it down. “Take a seat, and we’ll talk.”

“Has my mother returned?” Alistar asked. He was mildly concerned, considering the light outside was dimming.

“No. I haven’t seen any women that I would know instantly, though there have been a few that acted like royal snobs. None of those would have been her, would they have?”

“Funny.” Alistar looked toward the door once more and finally took a seat. Kepsi placed a cold beer in front of him, and he waved it away. “Kepsi, have you forgotten?” he hinted, “I only drink wine.” He laughed. Kepsi already had a bottle of wine in his hand, and two clean goblets.

“I was just testing you.” Kepsi smirked, knowing full well that he’d forgotten what Alistar’s drink of preference was. “When I’d heard you arrived this morning, I began to wonder what the special occasion was. Then when I saw you come in without even a wave, I began to wonder, could you be on something other than vacation? Are you on business? Do tell, Ali.” He sat back down and poured a glass of wine for the two of them.

“It is business, though I don’t believe I can give you much information on it.” Alistar sipped the wine and smiled. “Call it a personal issue that’s been taken so far that it MUST be taken care of.”

“Very well. On to another subject. “Is your mother always out this late?” Kepsi was quite curious of this person that Alistar had never bothered to mention, let alone bring around, and it remained a mystery to him as to why Alistar had brought her to the place he’d once heard him call a sanctuary.

“No. Normally she isn’t out.” Alistar would have finished his explanation, but at that moment, the door opened.

“Sorry. The bar is closed for tonight, ma’am. Rooms are full. Please come back tomorrow, and I’ll be able to accommodate you with whatever you need.” Kepsi made the comment without even thinking.

“Ali, where did you put my luggage? I was beginning to think the man driving our carriage had run off with it, so I walked all the way back there. He yelled at me! Me, Alistar!” the woman cried, ignoring Kepsi, and traipsed in, plopping down next to Alistar.

“Mother, meet Kepsi. Kepsi, before you proceed to feel neglected, this is my mother, Esmerelda, who so very confirmatively seems drunk, again.” Alistar was standing as she had walked in, and remained standing until Esmerelda had sat. “She may need an escort to her room.”

“I’m not drunk, Alistar.” Esmerelda, though she wreaked of alcohol, did not sound, nor look drunk. She glared at him as she spoke and slammed her hand on the counter. “I was throwing a fit because I’ve been stressed. You know that! With your father on his way over, can you blame me!?”

“Mother.” Alistar adjusted positions, suddenly very pale. “Perhaps you should go to your room, get cleaned up, and maybe get some rest. Don’t you agree?” Alistar had stood again and grabbed her arm. “Kepsi, could you get the key to her room please?”

Kepsi turned to grab the key and Esmerelda swatted Ali away. “I don’t want to go to bed! I want to finish my story about this evening!” she kept swatting at Ali as she talked at the top of her lungs. “I was just going to tell you that I ran into a girl that absolutely refused to bow to me, and she was so utterly rude when I very kindly asked her to step out of my way! I was really quite offended, and I want her to receive a severe beating before we leave.”

“Mother!” Alistar growled as he spoke. “You really must calm down. We aren’t in England anymore and people don’t give in to your every wish. Perhaps she didn’t recognize you, and in any case, I doubt we will be seeing her from here on out.” He sat back down as she did and looked over to see the young servant girl come from the room behind the bar. “Hello, Miss.”

The girl stopped the minute she saw the group sitting by the counter. Without saying a word, she grabbed a bottle of soapy water and walked out to clean the tables. She first locked the door, as the guests had left shortly after Esmerelda’s arrival, then proceeded to wipe down all the chairs and tables.

Alistar watched her for a moment and looked back to his mother. She was glaring at the servant girl, teeth grinding as she did. “What is it, mother?” Alistar asked, annoyed.

“That’s the girl. That’s the one that absolutely refused to show me respect. She deserves a good, stiff beating!” She stood, holding a rope Alistar had not noticed until now, and advanced toward the servant. As she did, Kepsi resigned to the back room, foreseeing the outcome. Alistar remained seated on his stool.

Esmerelda grabbed the girl’s arm and lashed the rope against her back. It ripped the girl’s shirt open, and Esmerelda took another swing at the girls back. The girl cried out and tried to pull away. “Hold still you stupid girl. You deserve this, and you know it!” Esmerelda kicked the back of the girl’s knee and whipped the rope at her again as she fell to the ground. The girl cried out. “Be quiet!”

Alistar let out a sigh and took a drink. Might as well let her finish, or I’ll never hear the end of it. He resumed watching, an empty expression on his face, and tapped the counter with his free hand.

Esmerelda continued beating. Each lash left a bloody gash in the young girl’s body. She cried out, occasionally finding the strength to attempt running. Five minutes passed… then ten, and she continued beating the girl. Words erupted from Esmerelda’s mouth that Alistar had never heard her say. She may not have been drunk, but she certainly had some alcohol in her. The girl’s body was drenched in her own blood. Esmerelda kicked the girl in the stomach, and a quiet cry came from the girl. She had stopped fighting and lay motionless on the ground.

Alistar looked at the girls face, covered by her arms, and she looked up at him, utter despair gleaming in her eyes. Tears of pain were streaming down her cheeks, swelling first like diamonds in her eyes. She’ll kill her, he thought. Her hair fell over her eyes as Esmerelda kicked her again. Such a beautiful creature should not die so young. He contemplated the results of stopping his mother for only a moment before he stood and grabbed the arm she held the whip in. “Mother.” Esmerelda continued to throw her arm, still trying to beat the girl. “Mother.” Alistar was calm. His voice sounded lazy, as if he didn’t care. Esmerelda stopped and looked at him, panting from her efforts. “That’s enough.”

“But-“

“You’ll kill her.”

“She deserves it if I do.”

"No, mother, she doesn't. The only thing she did was show the freedom she still has. have you forgotten? We do not rule Italy. We are only in alliance with them. Therefore, to kill a Venetian citizen, particularly one so young, would risk the peace we hold with this country.

I, for one, would not like to wager another war while we’re still taming the rebels in the old country. I especially would not like to do it when father’s return is so close. We don’t rule the world yet, and I don’t wish to. Italy has always been very good to us, so calm down, go up to your room, and pray… pray that that lump on the floor makes it through the night.”

 

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DATE: 04 May 2008, 2:38 am / MOOD: Tired

Insomnia, my insanity, has found me on the one night that I've been up and moving for the longest.  Woke up early, and I went to work.  That was... Interesting.  Got my check... Which NOBODY will cash on a Saturday... Just thought all of you should know.

Going to see Iron man tomorrow.  Don't know how I feel about it yet.  It's a marvel comic made movie... And so far I'm not impressed with those kinds of movies.  But I've been told Iron man has "the greatest story".  I wouldn't know.  I never read  my comics as a child.  I read Calvin and Hobbes... The old ones that my father kept, and BC comics.  Those were amazing. 

Good news is... I have 18 school days left until I am officially done with high school.  And then, maybe someday, I'll consider the culinary arts... Or rather... the education for it.  I've already considered the subject, obviously.  Then I will be back to my blogging and 15 hour sessions in the chat room.  I do hope some of you will be JOINING me.  lol.  I only have so many conversations that I can hold with myself.

Then there's my trip to mesquite/california.  I'm excited.  I will be in mesquite from the 1st to the 3rd.  and then on the 3rd and 4th i'll be in california.  Then on the fifth I'll be back in mesquite, and will be returning home June 6th.. Just in time for the salmon fry here in town. *ish excited* :)

Anyway... Now I'm just plotting character descriptions.  Couldn't help but notice there are people ONLINE right now!!! It's so freakin awesome!  Cause it's so early!!!! lol.  anyways... think i'll go take some sleeping pills. and now you've all got an update. sweet.

the former faery karen 

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