05 Nov 2006, 3:35 pm

Remember, remember the Fifth of November…

Hello, hello. It is the fifth of the month, and that means it is time for the SKKS. That is, the Supercilious King's Killing Spree. I am the Lady Death herself, Mors the Meticulous, and I have come to kill you. Now, to celebrate this lovely holiday, I shall have to do something very special. Usually, I take the hearts of my victims, but today I think I shall do something very… different.

Now, I hope you won't take this personally, for it's not at all out of spite or whatnot. In fact, I probably chose you because I find you interesting or amusing. So, sit back and enjoy your death.

(She steps around you and puts on some music-- Beethoven's ninth symphony-- and smiles gently, her skirts brushing against the floor. The small girl hands you a glass of wine and bades you sit down at her table. As you recline in a chair, she seemingly walks away and a moment later reappears behind you with rope in hand. She then ties you tightly across the chest and arms, pours gasoline over your lap, kisses your cheek, and walks away. As she steps out of the building, there is a loud roar and flames consume you. Explosives had been planted all over the house before you ever entered. Before skipping away down the street, she pulls out a playing card and tosses it into the flames. It is the Queen of Spades.)

I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason shoulder ever be forgot.